Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Homosexuality a big deal?

This post may not make much sense. It is simply my rambling thoughts on an issue that I haven't figured out and I don't pretend to have all the answers.

Nathan and I went to see Brokeback Mountain with Ryan and Heather recently and it has certainly stirred things up, in a good way. Ryan wrote an excellent post about the movie and his experiences with running into a friend (linked above).

I wrote a brief review with my thoughts about the movie on a message board I frequent. The message board is predominantly conservative Christian women, although there are a few that are further on the liberal side on some issues. They are a wonderful group of women, many of whom I count as good friends.

Because I wrote that review (and I kinda risked it a little, because I wasn't sure if I'd get backlash, which I didn't), one woman private messaged me sharing her views on homosexuality (that it's ok) and shared with me that she was quite hurt by some of the responses she received when she'd shared those views.

That really got me thinking about how the church handles the issue of homosexuality and what exactly is in the Bible regarding homosexuality (and how the Bible addresses it). It seems to me that the proportion of time the church spends discussing the issue (oftentimes without really accomplishing much) compared to other issues is disproportionate to how often it's discussed in the Bible compared to other issues. For instance, homosexuality isn't referenced or directly addressed as much as the issue of money is referenced or directly addressed.

Could it be that perhaps the church is spending too much time focusing on this issue? It seems to me that we should spend the time discussing the issues that are most important to God, as touchy as they may be with the church. How many sermons do you hear that talk about being godly with money, for instance? Yet that is one of, if not the most discussed issue in the Bible. When most people think about a sermon regarding money, they think of televangelist's trying to get people to send money to them so that God will bless them financially. I've heard some very good sermons regarding money, but it's sad that pastors have to tip-toe around the issue because so many people will think that they're just trying to get money, when it's a legitimate spiritual issue.

Or even more pointedly, think of how strongly Jesus rebuked the Pharisees for their legalism? How prevalent is that issue in the church? It's probably one of the biggest issues, in my opinion. Who are we to say we're better than someone else? We have been given the grace of God not by any effort on our part, but because Jesus died on the cross for each and every one of us, because we were ALL sinners. We are supposed to be reflections of Christ? But did he point fingers and rebuke the sinners he talked with every day? No, his righteous anger was directed towards the religious leaders who were judgemental, condemning and legalistic.

Obviously, homosexuality is something that the church needs to address because sexuality is something that many people struggle with, be it hetero- or homosexually, but it seems to me that most discussions the church has over this issue end up doing a lot of harm and not necessarily so much good.

We hear the cliche's of "Love the sinner, hate the sin" and such, but what does that really mean anyway? Most people who call themselves gal or lesbian, feel that their sexuality identifies who they are. They hear "love the sinner, hate the sin" and most likely hear something to the effect of "I'll love you when you're straight". That cliche really does nothing except make Christians feel better about themselves and gives them a way out.

How many people have we rejected from the church because they struggle with homosexuality, no matter whether they're flamingly open about it, or still in the closet, or somewhere in between? How can people open up and be vulnerable on this issue (that they may not even want to be struggling with) only to be shot down? Yet how often are people rejected from the church for other sins? Is there a disparity here?

Granted, there are people in the church who are open to learning about these struggles without just shoving people into a box labeled "sinner". We all have our struggles with sexuality in one way or another. Paraphrasing Ryan -- How can I say I'm any better than someone else just because my struggles are heterosexual in nature?

I don't really have answers, but I have questions... and I think that's where the church needs to start. We need to be open to hearing and understanding the difficulties and complications of homosexuality. People who struggle with these issues are hurting and need to be TRULY loved, first and foremost. I've walked with some friends through these issues and it totally changed my viewpoint and made me realize that it's not as cut and dried an issue as some churches, some people, some leaders make it out to be.

I sincerely hope that movies like "Brokeback Mountain" will cultivate questions in people, especially Christians, that will help them search for truth.

And I hope it will help people to respond in love and grace when these issues come up, rather than judgement and condemnation. Because that's really the heart of the issue.