it's raining grace today......

Tonight, I felt God' grace in a neat way. Lately I have been having moments of feeling overwhelmed, stressed out and the like due to my upcoming move. The timing coincided with my church's Grand Opening and I just haven't had the time to devote to some of my responsibilities. I have gotten the essentials done, but I haven't done my best.

At the leader's meeting tonight, I realized that I have a fear of failure, and worry what other people think of me. I realized that these things have been affecting my life in subtle ways that have stolen some of my joy. It added an extra burden to my life that I am not meant to carry. Yes, I am responsible for taking care of Nursery related things, and I have been slacking in some areas, but it is not the end of the world. The people around me understand and God knows what's up.

I can so easily get caught up in being busy and so easily let guilt weigh me down. But what good does that do? When I am focusing my attentions on God, the rest will fall into place. When I am connected with God and connected to his will, where can I go wrong? It is only when I stray, when I let the busyness of life get in the way of my relationship with God that all the pressures and stresses threaten to overwhelm me.

But that is what I love about God's grace. It is there for the asking. Wallowing in guilt or fear does no good, but taking God's hand and letting Him pull me up to my feet draws me closer to Him and sets me back on track. As long as I am "falling forward" when I fall on my path closer to Jesus, I will continue to grow. We all fall, I will continue to fall, but as long as I am letting God pull me up, or even pick me up, the falling doesn't matter. What matters is being close to Him, of keeping my eyes focused on Him and persevering on the path he has set before me.


God, thank you so much for your perfect timing. It may not seem perfect to my human eyes, but you know the whole picture and you know what is right and good, even though it may not seem that way at first. Thank you for placing me in a community of fellow believers who love you more than anything. What I love about our church is that we can all be ourselves, and that our "style" is simply a reflection of who we are. The love that we have for each other can only come from you! I pray that you would continue to grow us closer to you, both individually and as a church, that we would continue to shine your love everywhere we go! You are truly an awesome God!

Here I am Lord....

~Marieke